KEEP YOUR LOVE GLOWING 2
In the first part of this teaching, i have established the fact that marriage demands for extra oil and the special oil that will keep the marriage smooth and glowing needs to have some important ingredients. below are five of the things we need to do and even go beyond what we think is the limit
PATIENCE:– if you think you are a patient person, your marriage is a litmus paper test that will show the degree of your patience. Patience is about your high level of tolerance in the face of unpleasantness without losing control of your emotions. You are composed in the face of odds and you carefully mold your partner to fit the model that you have carried in your heart for years. If you do not have a lot of patience you may end up breaking your marriage instead of building it. Patience is a virtue that cannot be over-emphasized, even Jesus our Lord is greatly patient with us.
FORGIVENESS: As Christians, one of the things that we cannot compromise on is the act of forgiving others. Jesus emphatically said that if you do not forgive, do not expect forgiveness from God Matthew 6:12, 14-15 And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. Matthew 18:21 -22 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven. This is the standard that Jesus gave us as regards forgiveness. It is easier to forgive a brother or sister you do not see often BUT it may be hard to forgive the person who sleeps and rises with you every day. If you do it take extra oil of forgiveness, your lamp of oil will go out and the darkness in your marriage will be so great. Please carry extra oil of forgiveness.
KINDNESS: Showing kindness is part of our responsibilities and the displayed nature of God in us. We are not only to show kindness to fellow humans alone but even to animals we express kindness in many instances. It is very natural to show kindness to someone who has not hurt you before. But when it comes to showing kindness to someone that had hurt you or is hurting you, it becomes a task and what you need to do by the special grace of God. Kindness in marriage falls under this category. You must be kind to your spouse irrespective of the circumstances because both of you are one.
You need to be extra kind to the bone of your bone and flesh of your flesh. How then will you be hostile to someone who has assumed the position of your head as a woman? The Bible says in Job 6:14 (ESV) that He who withholds kindness from a friend forsakes the fear of the Almighty. If you constantly remember the past hurts that will not make you kind to your spouse remember this passage Ephesians 4:32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you. A kind heart is a golden heart. A blessed heart. You need to be extra kind to your spouse if you want the oil of your lamp to be sustained.
GENEROUSITY:- this is a show of liberality in your giving. Sharing with your spouse without really expecting a payback in the form of paying back a debt. Your generosity is expected to be all-round. You are generous with your finance i.e. giving when you know and sense there are needs without waiting for your partner to ask. You are expected to be generous with your time, spending extra time with your spouse even if it does not seem convenient for you. When you spend time together you will be able to support each other emotionally. Do not limit your giving to just finances, it is far more than that.
HUMOUR:- we are in a world packed full of stressors, there is no angle you turn to that you will not see what will stress you if you are not careful and in control of your emotions but having someone who can make you laugh is a great asset. As husband and wife do not add to the stress of your spouse instead focus on things that can make you laugh. Some individuals are super talented in making others laugh, some of them organize comedy shows or create comedy content, and husband and wife can watch these programs and laugh together. This simple act as it may be will go a long way to help your relationship. The Bible says in Proverbs 17:22 A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. Humor will not only help your bonding, but it will also help you to stay healthy.